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April 29, 2008

Sensuous Sextopus will Satisfy your Needs

My life was a mess; Sextopus has saved me from embarrassing, inexcusable, inappropriate, unmanageable, and extreme entanglements. It was love at first sight. The sinewy appendages, the inviting receptacles, and the penetrating blue eyes were irresistible. Instantly, I knew I couldn’t live a moment longer without Sextopus.

Sextopus is so amiable and highly adaptable; its only purpose is to conform to the master’s needs graciously without complaint. It’s just a matter of appendage adjustment.

Similar to the octopus, a distant cousin with eight tentacles, Sextopus only has six. But oh what it can do with those six appurtenances. It is a wonder to behold.

A characteristic peculiar to the echinoderms of which the Sextopus must be related is the ability to regenerate severed appendages. Lop off the arm of a starfish, and it will grow a new one. A Sextopus has the same ability, but even better. You can just rip one off, and it can be instantly replaced with one more suitable to your liking and special needs.

Are you beginning to think a Sextopus might be right for you too? Let me tell you a little more about what this little beauty will do for you.

Evenly situated around its silvery, circular, sensuous body are seven receptacles. One is a mini USB port for energy input. The other six are sockets for appendage attachment. Each tentacle radiating from the axis is approximately three inches long. The terminus of each extension can come in many forms depending on what you wish Sextopus to accommodate and make happy.

With the introduction of Sextopus in your life, you will immediately experience a newfound freedom from an angry, intricate network of electrical conduits that seem to grow by accretion with no organized plan. You will no longer depend on this snarling, sinuous snake pit powered by cumbersome charging units that take up two plug spaces and may require extension cords, multiple outlets, and power strips.

Sextopus will gladly give a charge to six of your friends at the same time without any compunction whatsoever. All you have to do is make sure Sextopus has a commensurate counterpart and is ready for action.

I tend to be quite discriminating about the company I keep by exclusively selecting companions of the mini USB species. This includes Windows Mobile devices, Bluetooth headsets, headphones, keyboards, GPS units and receivers, cameras, video eyewear, satellite radios, MP3 players, car kits, chargers, and more. But once in a while some aberrant form will creep in such as an iPod. But no problem, a sextopod can even give pleasure to an iPod and related forms.

One of the tentacles I received has a female USB tip. Accordingly, I can plug any USB cable into it to charge whatever thirsty pal I please using the USB cable that came with that device, which may have some weird proprietary connector.

Down with weird proprietary connectors. Up with mini USB!

The breeder of the Sextopus is a company known as Callpod. (I think they should change the name to Sextopod, but that’s just my humble opinion.) Actually, Callpod could probably ramp up its breeding program and create even more engaging species including Octopods and Decapods. Maybe then the company name should be something like Multipod. Podapus?

If you visit the Callpod Website, (www.callpod.com) you will find an exhaustive list of appendages that will accommodate almost any species of device you can imagine. Unfortunately, it didn’t have one for one of my cameras, so it still has some evolving to do. The nice thing about it though is the genetic engineering. Just let them know what you want and they will try to accommodate the demand. By the way, this charger is not meant for high energy consumption units such as laptops, so don’t ask.

There you have it. Sextopus is a solution to the universal problem of cable confusion. Why not let a Sextopus simplify your life and satisfy your frustrations? Just imagine a peaceful stable with your favorite devices radiating out from and serenely surrounding a sensuous Sextopus providing soothing sustenance. You will get a real charge out of a Sextopus, which could be yours beginning at $49.95. You can also get a car charger from Callpod to sustain the mother ship and take your feeding farm on the road. It even comes with a zippered nylon carrying case.

If I have not painted a clear enough picture for you, check out this video: http://callpod.com/tv

Keep connected!

Posted by conradb212 at April 29, 2008 03:09 AM